Everything about this feels so wrong. As he stands there, still looking at Roland the whole time while the other speaks, it's so, so wrong. Inigo messed up here. He knows he did. He's pretty sure it's just an objective fact in this case. And yet here Roland is standing in front of him. Smiling. Blaming himself rather than Inigo. Offering to help him. Calling it making amends, even.
If Inigo was anymore self-aware, he may realise that he's practically seeing his own usual behaviour mirrored in Roland right now. Taking the blame upon himself with a smile, no matter what happened. Wanting to do anything to make things better, even in cases where he didn't have any fault in what caused someone else to feel bad.
But Inigo isn't that self-aware. So he doesn't. Not right now.
Instead he quietly looks at the other for another moment more before he finally speaks up.
".. How many times..?" Inigo should probably cry. This is usually the point at which the tears break through, after all. And somehow right now they don't. His stare is weirdly enough almost emotionless. Like some switch inside of him has been flipped off, taking everything that makes Inigo Inigo with it.
"Roland.. How many times can I screw up before you realise that your promise to me isn't worth it anymore?"
Because it's going to happen. It just is. Inigo knows what he's like. There's going to be so much more dumb situations like these, and they're all going to be Inigo's fault. And at some point it will either kill Roland or make him turn his back on him.
Like what happened to everyone. Like what keeps happening, over and over. His father, his mother, Yuki, Gerome--
And he deserves it.
"Reno was right. I'm weak. I can't do a thing without someone holding my hand, and even then I can't do it without failing. There are so many others who need your support instead. You're too important to have your time wasted like that."
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If Inigo was anymore self-aware, he may realise that he's practically seeing his own usual behaviour mirrored in Roland right now. Taking the blame upon himself with a smile, no matter what happened. Wanting to do anything to make things better, even in cases where he didn't have any fault in what caused someone else to feel bad.
But Inigo isn't that self-aware. So he doesn't. Not right now.
Instead he quietly looks at the other for another moment more before he finally speaks up.
".. How many times..?" Inigo should probably cry. This is usually the point at which the tears break through, after all. And somehow right now they don't. His stare is weirdly enough almost emotionless. Like some switch inside of him has been flipped off, taking everything that makes Inigo Inigo with it.
"Roland.. How many times can I screw up before you realise that your promise to me isn't worth it anymore?"
Because it's going to happen. It just is. Inigo knows what he's like. There's going to be so much more dumb situations like these, and they're all going to be Inigo's fault. And at some point it will either kill Roland or make him turn his back on him.
Like what happened to everyone. Like what keeps happening, over and over. His father, his mother, Yuki, Gerome--
And he deserves it.
"Reno was right. I'm weak. I can't do a thing without someone holding my hand, and even then I can't do it without failing. There are so many others who need your support instead. You're too important to have your time wasted like that."