She starts, but then frowns. It's still hard to talk about. But in the face of what Rich is saying, Alice feels like she has to clarify, or else he might get the wrong idea. A wrong idea that still makes sense, because of course Rich would prefer the illusions when it's giving him exactly what he wants, but it's not quite what's up with Alice.
So she shakes her head, forcing herself to speak.
Come on, Alice. You've been braver in scarier situations.
"It's not that I don't want to forget them." She did have some things in that illusion she always wanted - but when the illusion cleared up, she ended up realising she did have those things already, all along. "It's that I.. I can't. My own mind is so fragmented that it's hard to get anything out of there."
It feels dumb, saying that. Like she can't do something that's so natural to other people. But she's trying to own up to it, even though she feels ridiculous.
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She starts, but then frowns. It's still hard to talk about. But in the face of what Rich is saying, Alice feels like she has to clarify, or else he might get the wrong idea. A wrong idea that still makes sense, because of course Rich would prefer the illusions when it's giving him exactly what he wants, but it's not quite what's up with Alice.
So she shakes her head, forcing herself to speak.
Come on, Alice. You've been braver in scarier situations.
"It's not that I don't want to forget them." She did have some things in that illusion she always wanted - but when the illusion cleared up, she ended up realising she did have those things already, all along. "It's that I.. I can't. My own mind is so fragmented that it's hard to get anything out of there."
It feels dumb, saying that. Like she can't do something that's so natural to other people. But she's trying to own up to it, even though she feels ridiculous.