The Ambrosia is deliciously warm as it flows past Thanatos's lips and down his throat. The taste is harder for him to identify. It's tart like a pomegranate but also somehow smoky and charred in flavor like it had been burned as an offering. His mind supplies the bay laurel as the fuel for the fire. There's a slight metallic smell like the River Styx, but beyond those scents are ones much like Persephone's spring on Erda.

It doesn't take long for Thanatos to realize why those flavors and smells are coming to mind, and perhaps there is a bit of luck that his cheeks are already flushed with gold. The knowledge of the metaphorical taste of this Ambrosia can be better hidden.

It's harder to stop the memory pushing its way to the surface of his thoughts.

Zagreus found him, curled up in a dark corner. The stars in his wings were the only real indication that he was even there. He would have otherwise blended in, overlooked.

Thanatos had been doing his best to stop crying, so he could get back to work. Mort was gone, and no matter how much he tried to convince himself that this was just his Fate, he couldn't stop crying like a weak godling. He was Death Incarnate. Everyone will leave him. Like they did for a month because he failed them.

And now... Mort too. His only friend. He knew exactly where he left Mort, but Mort was no longer there. He must have failed him too.

He couldn't even look for him and attempt to apologize. There was no time. Thanatos couldn't spend his time looking for Mort when the dead needed collecting. Or he needed to bring the shades to Brother Charon. Or doing his parchmentwork in the Administrative Chambers. Or attending to the tasks Mother and Lord Hades had for him. Or spending time with Megaera repairing the Underworld's and Death's image, who realized that Sisyphus broke a promise to Thanatos and placed him under the Furies' responsibility. There wasn't any time for him to be anything but Death Incarnate. That was what he was born to be!

Death Incarnate didn't expect his master's son to reach into the darkness of his feathered cocoon without hesitation and embrace him as he shuddered like a butterfly's wing. He tried to push him away. What if Lord Hades learned of this? The Prince should leave him alone. It'd be better for them both. Death Incarnate didn't have any friends. Not anymore.

"Then I'll be your friend, so you won't have to be alone! And that means after Mort comes back too, okay?! Because Mort's going to come back!" Zagreus wouldn't be persuaded. He clung tighter saying something about how sad Thanatos looked, and he wouldn't tell his father if he wanted to keep this a secret.

Thanatos stared at the wall behind the Prince of the Underworld, unsure what exactly he felt. The two of them would end up falling asleep in each other's arms, like Thanatos used to do near Hypnos before their respective duties separated them. He didn't feel as lonely when he woke up. And he had gained a reason to return to the House beyond work.

The memory had started so dark. Thanatos nearly thought he had somehow ruined this bottle, but as it continued, he realizes the comfort in the memory. Though drowned in sadness, it was the first time Zagreus had hugged him, and the first time Thanatos felt like someone saw past his role as Death Incarnate and the too heavy responsibility resting on his too young shoulders. Someone cared about him for what felt like the first time in a long while.

"It suits me because you gave it to me. You gave me an identity besides Death."

Thanatos never had the time to truly appreciate what Zagreus gave until he tried to escape. He could never give the attention to those he cared about. And now that he finally can without his duty getting in the way...

"Do you really want what you say? That we ought to take our time?"

He huffs, frustrated, at himself, at Zagreus, at these feelings he doesn't fully understand or know how to deal with.

"Because you really have no concept of which impulses to act upon and which to keep in check."

Thanatos isn't being pulled in every direction as mortals die. He doesn't have to cut short his time with Zagreus because of his job and role as Death Incarnate. He doesn't have to worry about Lord Hades deciding that he's had enough with him breaking his neutrality as Death, for getting involved.

"So let me ask you this..."

These tethers could snap at any moment. Thanatos could cease to exist upon returning home because there is no Life left. One of them could be on that platform, mindlessly walking forward without the other. His hands grip hard onto Zagreus because he feels like he could vanish at any moment. He tries to catch Zagreus's gaze, golden meeting red and green, as his voice trembles. He doesn't understand. Help him understand, Zagreus.

"... What are you waiting for? Wh-what are you waiting for? I'm here, already... right?"