"I was Thor. As always. He's who I always wanted to be. I'm still not past that old wish. And he had no place in the fantasy." He wipes his eyes as the tears restart. "He haunted my dreams, urging me to remember and be myself instead of him. That's why I haven't been sleeping. I've been running from him, from giving it up."

He tries to stand, gives up and leans back on the bench. "Maybe now his presence in my dreams will be a comfort."