middleofsomewhere | Conclusion

Conclusion

Thank you.

For those inside the system the voices of the Great-Seasons ring out around them once the red mass has vanished and the blue plinth it was smothering is freed once more. They don't have all that much time to reflect on that before they find themselves waking up once more in their bodies around the tree trunks.

Or at least, around the tube that is the Great-Season they entered through. All illusions have vanished now, all that is left are pipes and metal.

The Great-Seasons allow them passage out from the centre, no sentries or pipes attack them this time. Everything seems to have been put to rights, the walls in the Autumn sector have stopped moving, there is no strange weather effects in the Summer Sector, no engineering problems in Winter and all the camaloid creatures in Spring are calm. Any Helpmates they come across are doing their jobs and no longer malfunctioning.

After a small amount of time, enough to check that all is well, their SCA's light up. All Passengers are to return to the Voidtrecker Express.

Considering the vast distances involved it is probably best that they use the evacuation function to return to the Luggage carriage.

Once all Voidtreckers have returned the train returns to the Void once more.

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Alice starts moving the moment he does. If not just to make sure he doesn't just fall over - and make her fall in turn, considering how he's still holding on to her.

Usually she would say something like 'take your time', but that feels a little like being too openly nice, especially in combination with everything else she's doing here. So Alice keeps the words to herself, instead perhaps showing the sentiment by not rushing him with her movement speed at all.

"I think you better prepare yourself for a scolding, depending on who is staffing the medical carriage today." Alice can totally imagine Wen Qing scolding someone for being dumb enough to get themselves sick like this, at least.

Rich hobbles along with her, but he tries to move as quickly as he can, just to avoid putting pressure on her to help for longer than either of them wants. It's hard for him to focus on moving and talking, but he still does hear her, and manages a breathless laugh.

"Eh, I'm used to getting in trouble. It's kind of my job to piss off the Man. With a capital M." Does she. Know what he's saying, or is this another thing that sounds like nonsense to her?

Apparently it does sound like nonsense to her.

Because she doesn't instantly reply. It doesn't seem like she's ignoring him though. No, judging by the way her eyebrows knit together, Alice is trying to think really, really hard over here.

"As in.. a person?"

Is that why the M is a capital M? Is it a name? She's so confused.

Thankfully she is apparently capable of being confused and walking at the same time.

"Oh, uh, sorry. The Man is like... society, I guess? The patriarchy, capitalism, discrimination, all the stuff that keeps us down and keeps the power in control of only a few people. Usually rich old white assholes, because America fucking sucks."

Does she know what America is? God, he hopes so.

"So basically, where I was from, I was poor, and bi, and had a whole arsenal of health issues, so my existence kind of just pisses those in power off. And so I made it my mission to make sure I annoy them as much as possible!" It's not like he can do much at his age, but still, he has hopes for the future.

"Oh."

Maybe it's a bit of an understated answer to all of that, but Alice is really still thinking about it even as Rich is talking about it. It doens't sound too surprising to her - in fact, there are some things she immediately recognizes.

(It's the 'bi' part that has her stumped, though. He's bi.. what? Bipedal? Aren't most people?)

"I don't think that's only the case overseas. Things are exactly like that in London as well." See, at least she's heard of America. They're getting somewhere now, though very slowly. Just as slowly as they're heading towards the medical carriage. ".. did you go to a hospital for your health issues? Or were you not able to?"

Since he did say he's poor. Alice knows how that works out for most people when they have both health problems and a lack of money.

It's enough for Rich to know that she's thinking about what she heard, so he gives her a careful smile, hopefully encouraging her to think about it. He assumes that if she has more questions, she'll ask them.

"Ah. I'm sorry it's the same for you." He feels like maybe he should stop rambling about his sad life, but he still shakes his head.

"Nah. I couldn't afford it, and my dad didn't really take that stuff seriously. I... that supercomputer that was in my head sort of helped? But it wasn't worth all the other crap it put me through."

"I don't think putting a computer in your head really sounds like a good solution to anything, anyway."

Not that Alice can fully grasp the concept, even now, but from her own experiences, she just knows she greatly dislikes the idea of anyone messing with anyone's brain. Nothing ever good comes of it.

If anything, she feels like the people at the asylum probably would have tried the same with her, if she had lived in a world where computers were actually a thing.

"Your mind should just be your own. As should anyone's."

"Yeah, well, I figured that out pretty quickly after trying it, don't worry."

At least the two of them can agree on that much. Honestly, he doesn't know what she's been through, but he can assume that like everyone else here, she's had some experience, especially considering her last statement.

"Yeah. I think so too. Trying to fix people just so we apparently get along better is just messed up."

Despite her lack of knowledge about technology and computers - or perhaps because of it, since it makes it hard for Alice to imagine just what a computer could do inside of one's head - she can't help but find her curious enough to ask while they're still slowly getting a move on.

"Is that what they thought the computer would do? Make you get along better with others..?"

"Well, I thought it was going to do all kinds of things. It said it was going to improve my life, so I mean, that's a pretty broad definition. Probably should have guessed from the fact that it was so broad that it would turn out to be too good to be true, but I was young and stupid."

And desperate. Rich can still clearly remember how he felt within a few months in the high school scene, and how badly he wished he could be anything but invisible to the world.

"People do like lying to anyone who is young and stupid."

But this time she isn't saying it to insult Rich. It's just merely her using the same words he's using, because it's something she's often seen back in her own world.

Heck, people have tried doing the same to her.

"People also tried to send me to a place that messed with my head, claiming it was for my own wellbeing. It's an awful thing to say to try and sway people with." She glances ahead of them as she speaks, rather than looking sideways at him. "But unfortunately, it's often an easy lie to swallow and believe."

"Hey, you say that like you believe I'm stupid." Rich offers with a laugh, obviously meaning it as a joke. He's well aware that he's not a genius by any stretch of the imagination, and when he was younger, he definitely was pretty naive.

Plus, someone smart wouldn't have gotten a cold right now.

He listens as they walk down the hall, giving her a sympathetic frown. "I'm sorry you had to deal with that. It's... bullshit, the things people think will help people who are hurting. And the lies we tell ourselves to convince ourselves they're right."

"It's because you want to believe anything is better than nothing."

She knows. Oh, how she knows. Alice still remembers sitting in that therapy office, thinking about how badly she wanted to forget, not thinking about any of the awful, awful side-effects.

Sure, Rich may be stupid, or may have been a little stupid, but..

"I think we both have been stupid in that regard."

She's willing to admit that much. It's not all just him. She was just as stupid, just as blind, if not moreso. She fell right into the most obvious trap imaginable.

"Maybe I did, yeah. That makes sense. I was so tired of being invisible that I thought I could put up with anything. I did, for two years."

Before it finally got to be too much, and he wasn't stupid enough to keep falling for it. In his position leaning against her, he reaches out to squeeze her shoulder.

"We were stupid, but we're learning now, right? How to be better without anyone else's ideas for us in the way."

Ah.

Ah?!

Maybe she should have expected it, with them already having physical contact through her helping drag him over in the direction of the medical carriage, and yet it somehow manages to catch Alice by surprise all the same. Maybe since she just really isn't used to that kind of physical contact, no matter how light or small. So the girl looks surprised, then embarrassed, then ready to get angry and lash out--

But at least this time she realises it'd be unfair towards him, and quickly stomps that feeling as far back down as she can.

(She still looks pretty flustered though. How does someone handle people being nice?! Help, hotline?!)

"I mean.."

She's even just at a loss for words now. Ugh!! Someone come provide some lessons in how to handle social interactions.

".. I can recommend pushing the people who have wronged you under a train. It's very relieving." Thanks, Alice. Clearly handling this social situation in the best way possible.

Poor Alice, dealing with someone as touchstarved as Rich is. It only feels natural for him to support others with the physical affection he wants so badly, so he wants to give it to her. If she wanted him to back off, though, he certainly would.

Poor Alice's flustered look gets a raised eyebrow, but smartly, Rich doesn't comment on it, a bit more distracted by the mention of the train.

"Uh... have to say, I never tried anything like that. The only thing I thought of was burning the computer out of my head." They're so well-adjusted.

Just a bunch of well-adjusted teens over here with their well-adjusted ideas.

In fact, it's a small miracle that Alice manages to not wince at the mere mention of burning. Maybe she's desensitized for the moment after all the fire during the mission - her only saving grace right now.

Though the statement still makes her frown a bit. But that's for an entirely different reason.

"I'm glad you didn't do that." Even aside from it being about Rich personally. Alice doesn't want to see anyone going down that path, especially not for a reason like this. It's too unfair. "It just meant that you would have let them win. You can't ever give in to your oppressors." Even when they're.. a computer inside of your brain, apparently.

Rich wouldn't exactly blame her for wincing. It's an obvious trigger for him too, the smell of smoke still enough to make his breath pick up and his chest feel tight until he can walk far away from wherever it's coming from. And it's a nasty story for him to share. He isn't surprised to see her frown, though he shakes his head.

"I mean, you're more glad that I didn't succeed. I tried it, but... a friend of mine managed to save me." Thinking about Jake leaves his heart aching for an entirely different reason, though. "I found out pretty quickly that I was letting them win when I did that. Even if I took myself out of their plans, they just found someone else to keep it going."

".. Exactly," Alice replies as she walks.

At first it seems like it's all she's going to say in reply to what he's saying. But there's more. There's more she knows she could share - so at least Rich knows he's not the only one in that situation. It's just that it feels a little scary to share that randomly with someone, especially someone she argued with before.

But if there's anything this place has taught Alice, it's that sometimes she just has to at least try.

"I escaped from my abuser back home. But the next time I saw him, he was waiting at the train station for my replacement. If these people are left to do as they please, they'll just find more and more people to ruin. .. Hence why I made sure he couldn't anymore."

You know. That may be where that 'just push them under a train' mention from earlier was coming from.

Rich does maybe feel a little better to hear that he's not the only one. It's just a bit overshadowed by his immediate concern for Alice in that situation. If he had a choice, he'd wish that he was the only one who had to deal with someone taking advantage of a kid who trusted in them. He knows how bad it hurts to be betrayed when you thought there was someone in their corner.

"I'm... really sorry you had to deal with someone as shitty as that. I... if my dad ever did something like that, I'd make sure he couldn't survive."

They've reached the medical bay now, though, which makes Rich hesitate. Should he invite her in so they can talk a bit more? Or would she rather go wash her hands since he's all gross and sickly?

"I, uh, guess this is my stop."

For a moment she pauses, staring at the medbay ahead of them, and then back at Rich. Quietly, like she's thinking for a moment.

Then she gently shoves him. In the sort of way where she's still making sure he doesn't fall over, but she's still guiding him all the way until she's made sure to help him sit down on a bed. There. Much better. She can't trust him to maybe not fall over before he makes it onto one, okay.

"Then I'll leave you here." She at least has enough trust in some of the people usually working here in the medical carriage to know he'll be taken proper care of, so no further hounding is necessary. "Take better care of yourself. It's your right as someone who has survived all that."

Rich doesn't stumble quite as much as before, though he is grateful she actually helps him get into a bad. Once he's seated, though, he starts fiddling with the blankets, and really, as much as he might be sad to see her go, he is exhausted.

"Yeah. I'll be taking a nap, okay? So don't worry too much." He smiles softly. "I... think you should take a break too, after that mission. I'll see you around, though?"

It's a careful question, in case he hasn't impressed her enough to actually get her to accept his friendship yet.

".. Sure."

Okay, so maybe it's not the most enthusiastic answer ever, but you'd be hard-pressed to see Alice ever give an answer much more enthusiastic than this in the first place. Perhaps it's the best he can get in this situation.

She lingers awkwardly for a moment, as if she's unsure of what else to say, but then she starts moving out of the medical carriage, raising up a last hand in greeting, but without turning around.

"Goodbye for now."

And then she's gone through the door.

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Conclusion

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cw: talk of murder

cw suicide mention

cw suicide mention

cw suicide mention

cw: abuse and murder mentions

cw will probably just continue for a while orz

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