middleofsomewhere | So Familiar a Gleam: Conclusion

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So Familiar a Gleam: Conclusion

Time to leave!

There is not much of the city left, but the park is holding together as those anchoring help those who are not voidtreckers through back to where they belong. Monsters continue to attack and a little further out there is a battle of hearts and minds being fought with the mass of colours and chaos.

Eventually, after the bulk of citizens had been evacuated everyone with SCA's on would hear Jin-Roh's voice after a few frantic beeps, as Chiff aligned everyone's SCA's. "We are almost done here, if you are with anyone not tethered to a voidcraft get them to the evacuation point, as quickly as possible."

Anan pulls out of the anchoring point to call out to any defenders in the park. "Come on! Anyone who isn't a voidtrecker! It's time to go."

Luckily those off fighting the entity headed the message and made their way to the park as Jin Roh spoke again.

"Everyone else get ready. When we call it you need to leave. If you don't have your SCA on then get to someone who does."

As the last people rushed to the park Anan calls out again, through her SCA and outloud to the park. "You need to unanchor, before you can evacuate. Everyone be ready."

She goes in again though, because there are some last people, those from the large battle, getting through as another message was called.

"Almost there. Be ready. On my command..."

Anan unanchored again. "Quick everyone unanchor."

"NOW" Jin Roh's voice came through strong on their SCA's. Hopefully those with SCA's would grab those without.

There is some outside help as well, the train pulls anyone who is unconscious or still under the entity's control, forcibly evacuating them. This includes Wei Wuxian, Lan Wangji and Zagreus.

Luggage Carriage

There has been a mass evacuation before and that was crazy enough but since then the population of the train has almost doubled and now it is an extremely tight squeeze as everyone crashes into the luggage carriage at the same time.

The train jerks and rolls as they enter into the void at breakneck speed and again as they seem to slow, rather than speeding off though the void.

There's a crackling from their SCA's. "Voidtreckers? Voidtreckers come in!" Anan's voice. "Please tell me you made it..."

There's only a few moments of signal and soon they are flying though the void again, away from the strange non-world, the entity sealed for now. To new adventures, but first hopefully some time to recover from all that has happened.

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Madoka easily finds herself in the kitchen as well. Having seen the state of most people returning from the mission, she figures that being there and doing some work is the best thing she can do right now. Especially when - after a shower and all - she doesn't look as tired as most people.

So she's actually already in the progress of chopping some things when she hears the door to the carriage open. She glances over to find Ken there, slowly blinking before showing him a small smile. Madoka figures people can use smiles right now.

".. Hi. Did you come to cook too, or did you want to eat something..?"

He freezes for a moment before getting over it and pushing into the car. They both have an equal amount of right to be here, so asking 'why are you here' is stupid.

"Oh. Um. I was just going to start making some vegetable soup... since it's easy to make and I don't - I think there are people who don't eat meat around here..." He heads over to the sink to wash his hands first - if he's going to cook he needs to make sure his hands are clean.

"Oh, um.."

Madoka stares back at her cutting board for a moment, but then smiles when she turns back to look at Ken.

"I actually already chopped up some. Do you want to use those?" Especially since she figures - with Ken being the way he is - that he might want to get out of the kitchen before other people start moving in here one by one to grab food. So that might cut down on a bit of preparation time for him, at least.

"No, I - you made those for something, right? You should keep it. I don't want to take food away from you..."

She shakes her head. There's that same smile on her face, and absolutely no hesitation in the way she answers.

"It's fine!" Please, as if Madoka can't just chop some more vegetables. If anything, cooking is kind of a fun mindless thing to do after a mission. "Honestly, I feel pretty glad already if I can just help you this way!"

"I... um. Okay." He goes to grab a big pot to fill with water so he can start up the broth. "You didn't get hurt on the mission, did you? If you did, you should be resting."

"No, I.. did get a little hurt." Granted, she's not underselling it by much. Thankfully Madoka managed to avoid getting really injured, even during the mess at the end. "But some friends helped me out already, so it's okay."

So she's.. well, maybe not as right as rain, but a lot closer to that than a lot of other people on the train. She's fine enough to cook without feeling awful, so she wants to do this.

"Um.. I don't think I saw you much during the mission.. Were you alright..?"

He immediately looks over towards her and puts a hand in his pocket but - but she's okay. He relaxes a little.

"I... had a family. But not the one that's adopted me here. I don't... know if that means..." That they don't want him. But he's afraid to say the words, afraid of making them true.

Thankfully the idea of people adopting kids here is far from weird to Madoka, considering her own experiences. So that fact doesn't make her hesitate in the slightest. Instead she thinks about what he's saying, while moving over to the vegetables she chopped up and moving them to be closer to where he could put a pot on the fire.

".. What do you think it could mean?" Madoka asks. "After all.. It doesn't seem like there's much meaning behind it, right? None of us got to pick."

"I..." He sets the pot down perhaps a little too roughly, water spilling out. He sighs and grabs a towel to wipe it up. "... That Vexen doesn't actually want to be my dad. I don't really know Siebren."

There's definitely a startled - but slight - yelp when the pot is put down like that. Don't mind it, Ken, it's just instinctive. Madoka is like a bunny, easily spooked.

It's nothing that lingers though, since she's quick to seemingly calm down enough to speak up again.

"Why wouldn't he though?"

Not that Madoka knows Vexen. At all. She's never spoken to him, and she's pretty sure she couldn't pick him out in a crowd, but..

"If he said he wanted to be, then why would he lie about that..?"

"I don't know. Feelings are dumb." He huffs and starts the water boiling, leaning agianst the counter. "I just... had o ne dad for the first time, I don't need people fighting over someone who doesn't deserve it."

".. fighting?"

That makes her sound even more surprised.

Look, she sees those self-depreciation issues there too, but that's what confuses her the most. Are people fighting over Ken right now? Is that why he's looking so worried? His life sounds so complicated..

"Um.. Honestly, I'm.. not too sure of anything you're saying. I mean.. I don't know if people are fighting over you, but if they'd do that, wouldn't it be because they think you do deserve it..?"

"... I don't think they are, but I'm saying that they shouldn't. That's what I mean." He gets up and washes his hands again after putting the towel aside to dry. "Because... really I'm just a street orphan kid who no one wanted at home. ... It's still hard to believe that people actually want to be around me, here."

Ken.. sure has lived a life, huh. This isn't the first time he's mentioned something so sad all of a sudden, after all, and Madoka is starting to be able to piece all those bits together. It's quite a lot for someone his age - granted, not that she is all that much older - and maybe it's what leaves him to look down on himself so much.

Madoka goes quiet, thinking, but then shakes her head.

"Um, I've heard of a lot more people having trouble back home, and less trouble here.. But I think that might usually have to do with people on the train being a whole lot nicer."

"Nicer? I... don't know. I guess it depends. It's always.... a worry that they're going to leave. So it's hard to get close."

He's protected himself so far, but he's not sure what he'll do if or when someone he cares about leaves.

"But.. it's not like you can always just stay here by yourself, you know?"

Maybe it's since Madoka has the knowledge, the practical experience. With how she's been on the train since nearly the beginning of the current group of passengers, she's watched so many people she got to nkow leave. And it hurt, sure, but the alternative, having been alone all this time.. It's even harder.

"And even when they go.. you'll always still have your memories of them."

"Memories aren't the same, though. Memories of... memories of my mom aren't the same as having her here. Memories of Dad wouldn't be the same as having him here. It hurts a lot of the time. ... I don't know how to make it not hurt."

Madoka goes quiet for a moment, staring at the vegetables rather than Ken.

".. don't you think we all miss people?" It's said softly. After all, all of them were ripped away from their worlds. And even though some people had to miss important people to them for longer than others, Madoka still doesn't think it changes anything about the feeling. Everyone on this train is probably missing someone, hurting for someone.

"It's just something we all have to find our own ways to deal with.. So it hurts less. For me, just thinking about my family being happy.. makes me happy. I know it might be harder to think about your mom that way, but.. you can always imagine her being somewhere better."

He tilts his head towards her, indicating that he's listening. "I don't know if I can. I know they say people can go on to something better, but I don't think that's true. Still... I hope the rest of my team is at least happy right now." Not that they have to deal without Ken, because that hurts too much to think about.

He just hopes they're alive and well-fed for the moment.

"I don't like being left behind. I don't... I act like it doesn't hurt but it does."

"Well.. I'm not sure that there's anything anyone can do to help with that.." She softly says.

Because they cna't even give guarantees they won't leave him behind. No one is in charge of whether they get to stick together with someone or not in this place. No matter how much people might want to be with Ken, they could just leave on the next platform. That's how it works - and Madoka knows it very well.

So she does look apologetic for saying this, but she knows that saying anything else would just be a lie. And she doesn't want to lie to him.

"If my way of dealing with it doesn't work, then.. um.. you need to find your own, you know..? Nobody knows what would work best for you other than you yourself.."

"... I know. It's just... hard to figure out. Emotions... I haven't really dealt with a lot of them other than being mad for a long time." And now he's got all of them that he has to deal with and he knows he's not equipped for this.

"... I'm just rambling. I don't... I didn't mean to bother you. I'm always bothering you..."

Madoka goes quiet for a moment. It's not that she's being dismissive of his words - no, instead she's thinking about them in her silence, chewing her lip.

"No, I just.. think it sounds like you need someone to talk to." Especially since Ken's issues seem to be so big. But that's exactly the reason why they go far, far beyond Madoka's poor 14 year old mind. "I just don't think I really can't help you with them.."

Even though she'd want to. But if there's anything that she's learned from hearing about Ken's issues in the first place, it's that this is something she isn't capable of.

"Maybe it'd be a good idea if you would talk about this stuff with one of the adults you trust instead." Surely they'd know better than just kids like them.

"... Maybe. But I..." He hesitates. He really shouldn't be afraid, and yet...

And yet.

"I... adults have a way different perspective. I don't know that they really understand how things look like from... 'down here', kind of. ... I just..."

What's really the problem? He feels a warm presence, Dike in his mind urging him on. "... No one likes getting hurt. I don't want to get hurt again... I know I need to be brave and risk it, but..." He's scared. He's scared and he can't say it, because to say it is to admit it, to make it real.

"Well.. Yeah, they have a different point of view than us.." Though in Madoka's case, she often found that more helpful rather than not, considering it made her mom able to give her better advice than she usually would have been able to back home.

But she can still see Ken's point, and she shakes her head before continuing.

"But.. missing someone.. or not wanting to get hurt.. adults feel that too, you know. Even if a lot of them try to hide it." So many. Gosh. If Madoka has learned anything on the train, it's that. "If you know adults here who care enough about you to be like parents to you.. then I'm sure they'll understand and be willing to share their worries with you too. You shouldn't think you can't talk about this stuff.."

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